My oldest and I have a very special connection, and it isn’t simply because she’s my first born. It’s much deeper than that. I wouldn’t be the woman I am today had she never came to be.
I was 19 and pregnant—legally an adult but not quite fitting the role, although at the time I thought otherwise (nothing like parenthood to teach you that you haven’t got it all figured out). Her existence ushered me into adulthood. It called for some self-reflection and decision-making. It called for future planning and giving more thought to each of life’s moments. I was a mother now, which meant I had to grow the hell up and quickly. Because her ability to have a chance was contingent upon my ability to get myself together and do everything I could.
But here’s the thing, as much as I grew up and matured over the 40 weeks that I carried her in my belly, I didn’t just birth a new grown-up self when I gave birth to her. I still had a long way to go.
Instead, in the next few years, she and I grew together. She was reaching expected and anticipated milestones while I reached some milestones of my own.
Continue reading All the Ways Motherhood Pushed Me to Grow at mom.me.